Crucify My Love
by angst no miko
Summary: Songfic!!! Ruhana... Reviews Please!!!!!ü


Crucify My Love   
  
Standard Dislaimers Apply  
  
  
~*Crucify my love  
If my love is blind  
Crucify my love  
If it sets me free  
Never know never trust  
That love should see a colour  
Crucify my love  
If it should be that way*~  
  
I loved you with all my heart even if you don't reciprocate my feeelings. I still wait until the time comes that you would feel the same way too.  
  
"Sakuragi..." Ayako called me softly. I knew she knew of my state of mind. I turned to look at her and smiled with one of my goofy smiles.  
  
"What do you want with the Tensai?" I asked laughing my head off once again, pretending to be ok. She sighed then looked at the Ace of Shohoku. I looked at him again and dropped my gaze to the floor.  
  
"Why don't you tell him, Sakuragi?" she asked. I shook my head and sighed.  
  
"It's nothing... It's better this way..."  
  
~*Swing the heartache  
Feel it inside out  
When the wind cries  
I'll say goodbye  
Tried to learn tried to find  
To reach out for eternity  
Where's the answer  
Is this forever?*~  
  
"Do'aho" you always says. You never knew what I feel. You never stopped and looked at me for real. You just insult everytime you have the chance. I retort it with my faqmour 'Baka Kitsune' line then we would get punched by Gori becuase of our insolence. I f you only knew the way I feel about you. Everything about you. Your hair, your shooting skills, your defence... everything.  
  
We praticed for two hours more and I was bone tired when I entered the locker room. The heaven weeped with my heart as it's tears drizzle outside, purifying everything but not me. I walked out of the gym, into the welcoming arms of the rain and let myself be purified even for a little while.  
  
The heartache I feel whenever you are around gives me something to think about. Yes, I do think and sometime I think if this life is really worth living for.  
  
~*Like a river flowing to the sea  
You'll be miles away and I will know  
I know I can deal with the pain  
No reason to cry*~  
  
You are going away? You are gong to America? My eyes widened at the thought crossed our paths and everything I hope of having with you shatters in a single word. You are going to leave me all alone without even saying goodbye. If Ayako didn't tell me what was happening, I wouldn't have known.   
  
I hid my tears, blinking them away as they threathen to fall. I don't have a chance, I don't have anything to give you to stay. I went home feeling the lowest of all the scums in the earth. I didn't want these vall to hapen but it will happen.  
  
~*Crucify my love  
If my love is blind  
Crucify my love  
If it sets me free  
Never know never trust  
That love should see a colour  
Crucify my love  
If it should be that way*~  
  
I did remain the Tensai, didn't show anything rather then the naive, easy-going person that they all know. I knew my heart are bleeding but I should be reasonable for once. m love for him isn't right, isn't going to last. We are opposites as night and day and nothing would ever change that, besides, I'm to afraid to admit it to him. Yes, I am a coward, the self-proclaimed tensai is a coward.  
  
~*'Til the loneliness shadows the sky  
I'll be sailing down and I will know  
I know I can clear clouds away  
Oh is it a crime to love*~  
  
You left me standing there in the airport as we see you off. Once the plane left the ground, I let my tears flow and didn't stop until I fallen asleep, dreaming of you, yet again. I only think of you even if we are playing the games that we played. I wanted to hold you, love you but I knew I can't. Too late, too stupid to even realize that we can be together, no we can not, we can never be.  
  
~*Swing the heartache  
Feel it inside out  
When the wind cries  
I'll say good-bye  
Tried to learn tried to find  
To reach out for eternity  
Where's the answer  
Is this forever?*~  
  
~*If my love is blind  
Crucify my love  
If it sets me free  
Never know never trust  
That love should see a colour  
Crucify my love  
If it should be that way*~  
  
I sat there on the park looking at everything that was happy. I wish I were as happy as them but I knew I can't. y heaqrt is still with you and even if I die, I would love you still even if you are the coldest person I knew.  
  
Why, oh, why did my heart become like this. Inall the persons I've met, why did I set my heart on you as if I would be happy with you. You left me without even knowing and you would stay away without even knowing. I knew that I was a coward becuase of all the feelings you raise in me that I thought existed with all the girls I've courted. But it was too late and too stupid that I let you go without even knowing.  
  
~*OWARI*~  
  
Author's Note: The Song "Crucify my Love" is from X-japan's song. Sorry about the sad endings. i feeling a little depressed lately. Reviews please..ü 


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